Thursday, July 18, 2013
This too shall pass...
So I had a heart attack on Monday, and I was positive death was coming for me. An ominous cloud was looming overhead making my heart race at record breaking speed. Air could not enter, my lungs had slammed their doors. My pounding heart was the only sound in the world. And I somehow managed to find my way to the emergency room. Nurses. Needles. And Machines. I was surrounded by these things which should normally comfort a dying person… give them a sliver of light of survival. Instead I felt claustrophobic and impending doom. The tightness in my chest grew stronger and tears escaped my eyes, though they were squeezed shut. I wanted the darkness. I wanted to feel it close around me. Peace. I wanted peace. A sharp poke awoke my eyes and I looked down to see a clear line streaming into my vein. I felt coldness creep in and then I was calm.
The doctor came in, he sat on the edge of my bed. Rubbed my hand. And he spoke. A panic attack. That’s what had happened to me. And it was terrifying. Apparently these things happen to people.
So while my heart is still racing, I'm breathing. Taking baby steps to managing my stress.
Life is tough folks, but This too shall pass.